He accused opponents of the mining process of being “spoilsports who clearly [hadn’t] seen any films where tremors made roads wobbly and filing cabinets fall over”.
“Protesters wouldn't be so po-faced if they saw how wicked a proper tremor can be. Without fracking this country faces the real danger of running out of natural comedy phenomena within our lifetime,” he said. “Fracking would offer sustainable laughter for decades to come.”
A Daily News surveyed suggested 90% of the public were excited at the thought of tremors striking West Sussex, where mining has begun in the village of Balcombe.
“Nobody wants to see a tsunami or killer floods but let's face it, no-one’s ever died from tremors in this country,” said one respondent. “When that fracking kicks in, we could see some serious TV.”
Mr Cameron added: “I want there to be enough energy for my children and my children's children, and if that means a tractor has to nosedive into a gigantic crater in the road in a really cool way, then so be it.
“Critics of fracking obviously haven’t seen any 70s disaster movies. We could be looking at trapped miners, corrupt execs flying in by helicopter and one scenery-chewing gas expert who agrees to go down into the mine, just 24 hours before he’s due to retire.
"You'd think West Sussex would be excited about this. It's the only thing of interest that's happened to them since the Birdman of Bognor contest moved to Worthing."