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Italy quiz - the sequel. Five of these Italian-themed photos were taken in Italy. One was taken in England. Can you guess which one?

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Ad shamer, aka not letting the idiots get away with it. No.1: The Forgotten Waltz (book)

"She saw me kissing her father," purrs the copyline. "She saw her father kissing me," it ends.

Er, same thing, love.

Bonus ball: who signed off the advert below? Think you'll find the spelling is "irresistible". Still, it's only a poster for a book by one of our top novelists and is going up all round London – who's got time to check a dictionary, frankly?

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Five of these Italian-themed photos were taken in Italy. One was taken in London. Can you spot which one?

Answers on a postcard!

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Oh NOW it’s good enough to read. No.5: The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins (2008)

Twenty-six million copies in print? A much-loved read of teenagers around the world? Pahhhhhhh, not good enough. I will wait until they make a film of it and then I might have a gander. What's that, you say? They have made a film of it? Then bring on the 3 for 2 sticker! I'm cracking spines!

Why is the lady scratching her head? Possibly she can’t understand why the book is written like it’s aimed at teenagers.

Ah, you mean she doesn’t realise that it’s, er, aimed at teenagers? Looks like it.

So what is it about? I mean, I’ve seen the posters and the reviews of the film and everything. Actually I quite fancied reading the book. You’re no better than she is. It’s the story of a post-apocalyptic world where-.

Spotted in window of British Home Stores, Tunbridge Wells, Kent

You've got to love this warning to shoplifters: "Thieves will be prosecuted." Fair enough, but how about the sentence that follows: "For further information, please contact..."

What kind of further information is needed? "Hello, I was thinking of stealing from one of your branches, can you give me the approximate chance of me being prosecuted and the likely sentence? I want to work out the cost-benefit ratio."

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As The Apprentice series 8 hits our screens, we offer our take on the first episode...

SUGAR HQ, LONDON. 2012...

Apologies. Wrong picture.

NEW SERIES How to be irresponsible. No.1: panic buying petrol

To listen to the news, you would think we were already in a post-apocalyptic land of petrol shortages. We’re not, of course, but we probably will be by the weekend. So follow these tips on how to panic buy petrol, and good luck.

1) Run out of house in pyjamas towards petrol station. Take bundle of money in case banking system collapses and they’re not accepting cards. Well done, you’re already pulling off that whole “panicked” look.

Envelope spotted in office bin: history could have been so much different if this junk mail had reached him...

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Spotted on Tonbridge station this morning: a pirate. Standard

Meant to take it hi-res. Will try to snap him again tomorrow, if he hasn't been made to walk the plank somewhere.

More 'overheards in public' from Daily News readers

Overheard at Norbiton station, Surrey:

Man 1: Hello!

Man 2: Good heavens above! Hello! Were you on that train?

Man 1: As a matter of fact, I was.

(The contributor of this one writes: Durr! No, I regularly jump over the station wall in the middle of the night and then leave via these stairs).