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7 Worst Things About Smokers

7) Entering a room immediately after their last puff, so that the final stage of their cigarette is actually completed indoors. Hey, smokers, finish the fag and breathe out for about a minute. Then come in.

5 paintings that yesterday's buyer of the $120m The Scream could have had for much, much less on eBay

5) Abstract German shepherd in pastels. For a mere $6 this can be yours. Ideal for anyone who's ever fancied a painting of a German shepherd but not really been into traditional painting styles. There's a wonderful look captured on the dog's face, as if he's slightly disappointed by some development in his personal life.

BBC presenter Clare Balding’s top 5 unlicensed fights

5) John Prescott vs Craig Evans (2001). I like Presccers and have met him on a number of occasions. Farmer Evans picked on the wrong deputy PM when he threw an egg at him while Presco was campaigning… and JP lashed out, lightning fast. Boosh Boosh! as the boxing commentators say.

7 arthouse film-makers who sold out in quite spectacular fashion

7) Steven Soderbergh. It’s hard to throw the custard pie too hard at Sodes, which is why he only makes it to number seven on our list of sellout directors. After his breakthrough success with the excellent indie smash Sex, Lies and Videotape, he opted to go even more arthouse, with the forgotten flops Kafka and Schizopolis. His next project was as commercial as you can get – a straightforward adapter of an Elmore Leonard novel, Out of Sight, starring George Clooney.

14 things that will happen in any episode of Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA

14) The restaurant owners and staff are excited about his visit and refer to him as “Chef Ramsay” throughout the show like it’s some kind of military rank, even when he’s not in the room.

Joe Pesci’s top 5 Formula One crashes

Hollywood hardman Joe Pesci stopped by The Daily News’ offices this week to share what he considers the most significant crashes ever suffered in Formula One cars or during FIA world championship race weekends.

Next issue: Clare Balding’s Top 5 Unlicensed Fights

5) Indianapolis 500, 1958 This one’s so sick I got bile in my mouth already. Krhhhhhhghhhh. Krhhhhggghhhh. Raagghhg. Raaagghhg. ‘Scuse me while I dislodge that. ’Scuse fucking me, okay? Okay, I’m done.

5 alternative Mother's Day gifts and treats

5) Offal. Nothing says "Mother's Day" better than a tray of organs and entrails from a butchered animal. Offal is available cheaply from supermarkets and butcher’s shops and can be made into a whole host of dishes, such as steak and kidney pie or liver and bacon. Delicious. Or simply wrap the offal raw in gift paper.

10 worst things about playing live poker

10) The delays for tournaments to start. Oh, the delays. And the terrible wait when you bust out early in a home tourney. It’s at times like these that you ponder the big one: WHY?

9) The food. What’s that – you don’t like burger and chips? Then you’re going to die. And the closest you’ll get to fibre in here is the napkin.

Cracking picture, isn't it? Bet the photographer punched the air when he saw how it had come out.

6 myths about diarrhoea, set against great paintings of the world

Diarrhoea is better out than in. False.
Diarrhoea is a sign of irritation in the bowel, which causes an imbalance in fluid absorption. Treating diarrhoea with an anti-diarrhoeal medicine can help you feel better and allow you to carry on with your everyday life.

The Hay Wain by John Constable (1821)

5 ways to mark the lifting of the ban on naming Ryan Giggs

5) Like Ryan, don't have an affair with former Miss Wales Imogen Thomas.

4) Now the ban on naming Ryan has been lifted, his parents can go ahead and name him. So help them decide on a moniker. Bryan or Byron maybe, or something modern like Frankie Cocozza. Or just stick with Ryan Giggs.